Unlocking the Immersive Power of Deep Point of View: A Masterclass in Character Connection

Albuquerque, NM – In the competitive landscape of contemporary literature, authors across all genres—from the swoon-worthy romance to the intricate historical saga and the pulse-pounding mystery—share a singular, ambitious goal: to forge an unbreakable, personal bond between their characters and their readers. This profound connection, the lifeblood of compelling storytelling, was the central focus of a recent workshop held by the New Mexico Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI), a vital regional chapter of the national organization. The session, titled "Close Third Person or Deep Point of View, DPOV," was expertly led by acclaimed Young Adult author Kimberley Griffiths Little.

Little, a prolific writer whose bibliography includes popular YA novels such as Forbidden and Banished, and beloved Middle Grade titles like When the Butterflies Came and The Time of the Fireflies, also publishes under the name Kimberley Montpetit, where she has independently released works like The Executive’s Secret and Unbreak My Heart. Her expertise in crafting resonant narratives was on full display as she demystified the technique of Deep Point of View (DPOV), a storytelling method designed to plunge readers directly into the consciousness of a character, offering an unparalleled level of intimacy and immersion.

The Essence of Deep Point of View: Beyond the Surface

At its core, Kimberley Griffiths Little explained, DPOV is about capturing a character from the "inside out." It’s about presenting the world not as an objective observer might see it, but as filtered through the unique lens of the protagonist’s knowledge, perceptions, senses, emotions, and experiences. This approach, she emphasized, moves beyond mere description to cultivate a truly immersive reading experience, revealing "more of who the character is."

Perhaps the most tantalizing aspect of mastering DPOV, Little suggested, is its direct correlation to achieving what writers often consider their greatest prize: The Voice. A distinctive, authentic narrative voice is crucial for engaging readers, and DPOV provides a powerful pathway to cultivating and solidifying it.

The Unseen Gatekeeper: Banishing the Narrator

A foundational principle of DPOV, and one that often requires significant authorial effort, is the imperative to "boot out the narrator." Linda Wilson, a contributing writer and author whose own experiences with early drafts highlight this challenge, shared a poignant anecdote. Her first manuscript was returned with a stark, all-caps directive from a beta reader: "GET RID OF THE NARRATOR! Then send it back to me." This feedback, while initially jarring, underscored a critical truth: an overt narrator, standing between the reader and the character’s experience, creates a barrier to intimacy.

Wilson, echoing sentiments common among experienced writers, noted that eliminating the narrator and embracing "showing, not telling" is a skill honed through practice and revision. Even seasoned authors, she acknowledged, often find "telling" and the lingering presence of a narrator re-emerging in later stages of manuscript development, necessitating vigilant pruning.

To illustrate the distinction, workshop examples effectively highlighted the difference between a narrative voice that tells and one that embodies the character’s perspective:

Narrator: "She wished she could whisk back in time and redo the last few minutes."
Without the Narrator (DPOV): "Too bad life didn’t come with an undo button."
Narrator: "He had to think hard about what to do next."
Without the Narrator (DPOV): "What should he do next?"

These concise examples demonstrate how DPOV transforms exposition into internal thought or immediate reaction, directly involving the reader in the character’s thought process.

DPOV in Action: Experiencing the Story Through the Character’s Senses

Kimberley Griffiths Little’s workshop provided practical demonstrations of DPOV in action, encouraging participants to embody their characters and live within their minds and hearts. The goal is to take the reader on a journey through the character’s lived experiences, rather than simply recounting them.

The following comparative examples showcase the subtle yet profound shift achieved through DPOV:

Shallow: "Desiree’s skin prickled with pleasant excitement."
Deep (DPOV): "Shadows loomed. The place reeked of ancient secrets. Desiree’s skin prickled." (Here, the reader experiences the prickling sensation directly, contextualized by the character’s immediate sensory input and implied unease).
Shallow: "He could see the tip of the dog’s nose peeking out of the closet."
Deep (DPOV): "Barry stepped through the door and entered the room. ‘Aha! There you are!’ The tip of the dog’s nose peeked out of the closet." (The action of Barry entering and speaking immediately places the reader within his perspective, revealing the dog’s presence through his observation and interaction).

A key technical point addressed by Little was the use of italics. She firmly stated that DPOV is not italicized. In fact, italicizing thoughts tends to pull the reader out of the immersive DPOV experience.

With italics: "Jane looked out the window. Wow! Look at that sunshine and dew sparkling on the roses. What a perfect day for gardening. I’d better go get my tools. She went to the garage and scanned her shelves. Now where did I put my gloves and trowel?"
Without italics (DPOV): "Jane looked out the window. The dew on the roses sparkled in the morning sunlight. Wow! Would there ever be a better day for gardening? Humming, she hurried into the garage. Her gaze searched the wooden shelves. Where had she stored her gloves and trowel?" (The revised version integrates Jane’s thoughts and actions more seamlessly, using her humming and her gaze to convey her intent and internal state).

Navigating the "Pitfall Words" and Constructing Immersive Prose

A significant portion of the workshop was dedicated to identifying and avoiding common "pitfall words" that can inadvertently create narrative distance. These words often signal an authorial intrusion or a reliance on telling rather than showing. Authors are encouraged to perform manuscript searches for terms such as:

Think, Know, Feel, Realized, Caused, Made.

Instead of these distancing words, Little advocates for a focus on the immediate sensory experience and present-moment action: Touch, Taste, Smell, Sight, Sound, Emotions.

Specific word categories to be wary of include:

Verbs that create narrative distance: Saw, considered, made, caused.
Phrases that describe internal states externally: She felt: watched, thought, realized, wished, decided, wondered.
Prepositional tells: with, of, in (when used to explain a character’s state or observation).
The "IT" Trap: The vague pronoun "it" can be a sign that descriptions or actions are not specific enough, leading to less dynamic prose. Substituting "it" for concrete nouns and detailed descriptions weakens the immersive quality.

The workshop also emphasized the importance of choosing "power words" – precise and evocative vocabulary that enhances sensory details and emotional impact.

Workshop Takeaways: A Platter of Practical Advice

Kimberley Griffiths Little offered a comprehensive set of actionable tips for writers aiming to master DPOV:

Minimize the overuse of "to be" verbs: These can often lead to passive sentence structures and a less immediate feel.
Prioritize writing scenes over summarizing: Instead of telling the reader what happened, immerse them in the unfolding events.
Share from the "inside out": Emphasize the character’s internal world and perceptions, rather than adopting a detached "watcher’s" perspective.
Research physiological reactions: Understanding how emotions manifest physically in the body can add depth and authenticity to a character’s experience.
Write moment-to-moment: Capture the flow of immediate experience, focusing on what is happening now for the character.
Break up extended descriptions and internal monologues: Interspersing action with descriptive passages or dialogue keeps the narrative dynamic and engaging.
Show, don’t name, emotions: Instead of stating "she was sad," describe the physical manifestations of sadness – a slumped posture, a lump in the throat, a watering of the eyes. Ask yourself, "How would my character react physiologically and mentally to this emotion?"
Recognize when DPOV might not be ideal: While DPOV is powerful, there are instances where a slight narrative distance is beneficial for the reader’s relaxation or for a character’s reflective moments, such as when they are sharing with friends or offering broader commentary.

Author Spotlight: Kimberley Griffiths Little and Linda Wilson

Kimberley Griffiths Little’s extensive body of work, spanning multiple age categories and genres, attests to her mastery of character-driven storytelling. Her website, https://www.kimberlygriffithslittle.com, offers further insights into her writing and career.

Linda Wilson, the contributing writer for this piece, is herself a published author with several new releases to her name. Her latest is Secret in the Mist, the second installment in the Abi Wunder trilogy, published in December 2025. She has also seen success with the award-winning Botas Altas (the Spanish version of Tall Boots) and Cuna en la Naturaleza (the Spanish version of Cradle in the Wild). Upcoming releases for Wilson include The Pur-r-rfect Costume, a bilingual picture book, and A Home Run Friendship, a middle grade novel.

The workshop provided invaluable tools and insights for writers seeking to elevate their craft, emphasizing that the journey to truly connecting with readers is often found by delving deeper into the hearts and minds of their characters. By mastering Deep Point of View, authors can transform their prose from mere storytelling into an unforgettable, immersive experience.